First Psychology blog

It's Friday 13th, the only one in 2016, and those of you who suffer from a fear of Friday 13th may well be feeling some of the common symptoms of phobia.  These include: shaking, feeling disorientated or confused, sweating profusely, rapid heart beat, dry mouth, dizziness, nausea, and pains in the chest. Often people also worry about being out of control, fainting or even dying, and this can add to the feelings of anxiety and distress. So why fear Friday 13th? There are a whole range of reasons why it is thought we fear this day, many of them stemming from associations with bad events in the bible. However more generally speaking, phobias are strong irrational fears about something being dangerous when there is little or no danger at all. Sometimes we develop fears and phobias following a traumatic event and this creates an association between our object of fear and the bad event. However often people with a phobia or fear have no idea where it has come from. How do phobias...

Growing up in a relaxed and happy environment can reduce anxiety levels in children. However, perhaps family life is not as perfect as we’d like it to be. Psychologists have long argued that our relationships with family members have an enormous impact on our well-being. It is therefore crucial to put both time and effort into them in order to make them as strong as they can be. Here are some tips to help create happy families. Fun. Have fun together. It can be easy to dismiss activities as 'something for the kids' while you just sit and watch, but having fun and laughing together is a crucial bonding experience. Get involved with the kids and don’t be afraid to be silly.  Allow free communication. This does not include talking about mundane daily topics, but discussing real issues that matter to your family. If you provide an open environment where your children are encouraged to communicate freely about their opinions and lives, they will be more likely to come to you i...

Friday 13th March is approaching and as well as the usual superstitions, it is also 'No Smoking Day'  - a fantastic opportunity to finally kick the habit once and for all!  Overall, tobacco smoking is estimated to be responsible for more than a quarter of cancer related deaths in the UK, that’s over 100, 000 deaths a year. Furthermore, the average smoker will spend more than £2700 a year on cigarettes. The dangers and costs of smoking are well publicised, but despite the facts, it can still be a huge struggle to quit. However, other people have successfully quit before you - follow these tips to get one step closer to completing the challenge. Don’t keep putting it off. Plan to quit on the 13th March and do it!  Studies have shown combining medicine with social support is the most successful method for quitting. So, get prepared before the big day. Talk to your pharmacist or GP about possible nicotine replacement therapies and let your friends and family know you're ...

At some point in our lives we all deal with rejection. Even if we’re smart, beautiful or funny, rejection hits us hard, especially when it comes from those closest to us. Despite the hurt we may feel immediately, rejection doesn’t need to stop us in our tracks. Whether you feel rejected from your partner, a job or a friend you can use the pain as an opportunity to grow stronger by following this advice. Think about the positives. The most important thing to do is not measure your worth against the opinions of others. Instead think about your achievements and all the people that do care about you rather than focussing on the negatives.  Think of reasons behind the rejection. Understanding that it wasn’t personal can be a big help in moving on.  Look to the future. Despite what fairy tales led us to believe growing up, it takes time to find 'the one'. If someone you thought you had a future with has rejected you then they were probably not your perfect partner! Try to view t...

At this time of year when we tend to look to the future and the shops are suddenly brimming with Valentine's gifts, it may be hard to face the fact that a relationship has ended badly. When you are not well matched a relationship is likely to end badly. However, if you keep picking the wrong partners it can leave you feeling helpless and alone. Firstly, ask yourself these questions to see whether you keep dating the wrong people. Do the same problems keep arising in each of your relationships?  Do you attract partners that need your help in some way? Are you trying to fix them?  Are you unable to be yourself in your relationships?  Do you spend a lot of time trying to please your partner at the expense of your own happiness?  Do you always behave in the same negative ways? (I.e. become jealous, over critical)  Make a list of characteristics of the people you have dated. Are these really the types of people you wish to end up with?  If you an...

It’s the beginning of a New Year and we all want 2013 to bring us something exciting. Whether you wish to get in touch with old friends, look for a new job or are looking for love, social networking is a good first step. Fortunately modern technology means you can now do this from your sofa! According to recent statistics, 59% of us are now using some form of social networking. Whether it's Facebook, Twitter, MySpace or LinkedIn, social networking is a powerful tool to help you manage and expand both your personal and professional life. It is therefore crucial to portray yourself in a positive way. Here are some hints and tips to becoming social networking savvy. Unfortunately, it is impossible to separate your professional and personal life on the Internet. One simple Google search and your boss could see photos of you dancing on the desk at last year's Christmas party… so be very careful what you upload.  Show off your personality. There is no point trying to portray so...

So you’ve set your 2013 resolutions, but now for the hardest part… keeping them. Evidence has shown that 40% of us give up our resolutions by the end of January. but if you follow this simple advice you can make 2013 a year for real change. Put your resolutions in writing. Studies have shown that writing down your intentions improves your chances of sticking to them.  Have a role model.  Find someone who has achieved what you want to achieve. Whether they are a celebrity or a friend, knowing that someone else has done it can give you the confidence to do it too.  Pinpoint potential obstacles. Figure out a plan beforehand so you are prepared to tackle the situation. For example if you are going for dinner but are trying to diet, have a healthy snack beforehand so you aren’t so tempted to have a huge meal.  Believe in yourself! As long as you have set yourself manageable goals you are more than capable of achieving them.  Do it with a friend. Going through th...

Positive psychology is a growing field of study and as such, there is a wealth of research revealing ways to live longer, healthier and happier lives. Here are some interesting findings on happiness. Happiness has its roots in our genes – although 50% of our happiness is created by external factors such as relationships, health and work, research conducted at the University of Edinburgh and Queensland Institute has found happiness is partly determined by our personality. They also found that personality and happiness are, by and large, hereditary. People with certain types of personality are happier – using a framework called the Five-Factor Model to rate participants' personalities, the research above also discovered people who are sociable, conscientious and do not excessively worry tend to be happier. There are six variables that predict happiness – various research has revealed positive self-esteem, perceived sense of control, extroversion, optimism, positive relations...

Recent reports by BBC News have revealed a link between domestic abuse and international football tournaments. During the 2010 World Cup, domestic violence surged. Figures from police forces across England revealed that when England lost to Germany there were 724 more cases of domestic abuse, an increase of 29%. However, it is not only losing that causes abuse to rise. When England beat Slovenia, there were 516 more cases reported which is an overall increase of 27%. Nevertheless, when England drew there was no significant impact on domestic abuse. It has been argued that football does not cause domestic abuse but it can, in some relationships, be an issue which compounds it. Domestic violence is an attempt to exert power or control over another person using fear, intimidation, verbal abuse, threats or violence. Over time, victims often become isolated from family and friends, losing their network of social support, and the abuser may use increasingly brutal methods to control, leadin...

Contrary to the woes of premarital cohabitation in our previous blog, evidence has recently come to light which suggests it is the individual's attitude toward the decision to live together that determines whether the relationship will succeed or fail. Couples who demonstrate commitment to each other before shacking up, by getting engaged for example, fair just as well as those who marry without living together first. Indeed, women may even reduce the risk of divorce if they make a conscious decision to live with their partner before marriage, though are twice as likely to part company if they serially cohabit. With this in mind, the decision to live together should not be taken lightly. Here is some advice on what to consider before doing so. Speak now or forever hold your peace - discuss issues, such as chores or who's welcome in your home when you're not around, before you move in. This will save problems later down the line. If you're worried bringing issues up will...

From co-operation at work to co-operation at home, premarital cohabitation is a popular and growing trend since the 1970s in all countries except catholic ones. For many, it is seen as a trial run before tying the knot, but is it such a good idea seeing the divorce rate for couples who cohabit are higher, and living together as a couple before marriage in the USA before 2000, was associated with lower marital satisfaction, lower commitment among men, poorer communication, higher marital conflict and higher rates of wife infidelity. Some attribute this statistic to individuals having lower standards for those they are willing to live with than marry. A lot of couples live together for convenience, but it is inertia and the investment they have made which stop them from getting out or starting over again. This leads them to drift into marriage, rather than making a conscious decision to do so, which in turn, leads to disaster. Furthermore, 40% of couples who cohabit have children which...

Some people regularly look back to the good old days whereas others can’t wait to see what’s around the corner and some just focus on the here and now. According to researchers at San Francisco State University however, the happiest people are those with a balanced time perspective. That is to say, individuals who live in the present, look fondly towards the past, and anticipate the future, are more satisfied with their lives. The findings of this study, reported in the Journal of Happiness Studies, reveal that relying too heavily on any one time dimension can make it difficult for us to move forward, can limit our cognitive flexibility in certain situations and also lead to destructive behaviours. For instance, a very hedonistic, live in the moment attitude could lead us to over-indulge or live to excess. Living in the past may keep us from enjoying the present; living too much in the present may stop us from achieving future goals; but at the same time, looking to the future too much...

We all feel stressed at work and have bad days from time to time, but burnout is different. The term ‘burnout’ was coined in 1974 and has since been described as a condition ‘induced by chronic stress that is characterised by emotional or physical exhaustion, cynicism and a lack of professional efficacy’. According to psychologist Christina Maslach, burnout results from a significant mismatch between our beliefs and factors in our lives such as workload, sense of control and reward (or lack of), and fairness. One factor on its own might not be a problem, but a combination of too much work and a boss who treats you unfairly might cause burnout. Burnout is a silent condition that creeps up on us slowly. Here are some tips on how to identify the warning signs and prevent burnout before it takes hold. Recognise it – Do you dread the thought of going into work? Are you passionate and motivated about things or is everything just a burden? Are you irritable with co-workers? Are you ...

Have you ever been so immersed in what you’re doing you lose track of time? Focusing so intently on the task at hand you’re not conscious of what you’re thinking or feeling? Every action you take is automatic, you’re using your skills to the best of your ability and you feel energised in doing so? We might use phrases such as being ‘in the moment’, on the ball’, or ‘in the zone’ to describe these feelings and according to positive psychologist Mihály Csíkszentmihályi, these experiences also describe a mental state known as ‘flow’. Flow can be experienced in many ways. Some people experience it while engaging in sport and others during creative pursuits. It can last for minutes, hours, days or longer periods of time. Flow is an inner state of being that brings us happiness because we become absorbed in activities which have meaning and purpose and as a result, feel connected to our inner self and others. So, how do we experience flow and achieve happiness? Factors for achieving flow Th...

Pet owners often comment how happy their furry friends make them, so in honour of National Pet month this April, it seems appropriate to examine the idea that owning a pet can be beneficial to our health. Animals have been used in medical settings for over a century and a half, but it is only in the last three decades that this bond between man and mammal has been studied scientifically. Indeed, an early study from 1980 revealed patients who suffered a heart attack, and also had a pet, lived longer than patients who didn't own one. Other research has also found that petting your own dog can reduce blood pressure. A more recent study, by the University of Missouri College of Veterinary Medicine, discovered an individual’s level of oxytocin increased when they interacted with animals. This hormone makes us happy and trusting and may explain this bonding feeling we get. Oxytocin allows our bodies to grow new cells, preparing us to heal, so we are more likely to be healthy. Findings su...

Many of us like to treat ourselves when we feel down in a bid to make ourselves happy. As discussed in the previous blog however, people in Costa Rica are shown to be happy on far fewer resources than most of us consume. In the current climate with unemployment rising and anti-depressants at an all-time high, it is no wonder we struggle to be happy. But are our expectations of happiness too high? According to Greek mythology, ancient Egypt and cultures throughout the Mediterranean before and after Christ, happiness is, in fact, a miracle. Indeed, this is reflected in Indo-European languages in which the words ‘luck’ and ‘fate’ are equivalent to that of ‘happiness’. In English, the root of happiness derives from the Middle English and Old Norse ‘happ’, which means chance and fortune and appears in words such as ‘perhaps’ and ‘happens.’ In Spanish and Portuguese the words ‘felicidad’ and ’felicidade’ stem from the latin word ‘felix’, which means luck, and fate. Furthermore, the word ...

With many of us feeling the pinch, it can be easy to confuse being better off financially with greater well-being. However, an innovative measure known as the Happy Planet Index (HPI) questions this idea by examining how each country converts the planet’s natural resources into longevity and happiness for its citizens. Surprisingly, the country with the highest level of well-being amongst its citizens and the highest HPI, is Costa Rica. Costa Rica is by no means the richest country in monetary terms but uses only a quarter of the resources most countries use, and was ranked the 6th happiest nation on Earth by a recent Gallup poll (2010). In contrast, the USA, which uses triple the resources of the average person and whose citizens’ well-being has remained the same over the last 50 years in spite of this, has a HPI of 114 only one place above Nigeria. So why is this? Perhaps it’s because countries like America measure success in terms of money and material possessions which are not ...

In celebration of St Valentines day, here at First Psychology Scotland we are looking at how to cultivate a love that endures. Love is often portrayed as a complicated concept but it is, in fact, very simple. It is a decision we make to give to another person, rather than just how we feel. Here are some of the ways we can give to maintain our love. Maintain positive illusions  According to Marcel Zentner at the University of Geneva, “men and women who continue to maintain their partner is attractive, funny, kind, and ideal for them in just about every way remain content with each other”. As relationships endure it is easy to criticise your partners behaviour rather than valuing them and their unique qualities, particularly during difficult times when strain is put on the relationship. Learn forgiveness  We are often more forgiving of those we hardly know, why is this? In order for love to grow and last, we must learn to be more forgiving of those we love. Boost your oxyt...

January is usually a cold month, and it seems it is a chilly time for marriages too. It is reportedly the most popular time of year to file for divorce - so much so that in legal circles it has been nicknamed 'divorce month'. According to statistics published by eDivorcePapers.com, January does indeed have the most legal breakups. Some people even go as far as to specify ‘divorce day’ claiming the first Monday after children go back to school -  or the start of the first full working week - is the most popular. However although January is when people take the plunge, it seems people start gathering information much earlier. Meyer, who founded DivorcedWomenOnline.com, reports an increase in the number of page views of the website on Boxing Day. But why is January such a popular month to instigate divorce? At the end of each year it is common to look back and reflect on the year gone by. By doing so, people who are not happy in their relationship may assess their situatio...

Christmas and New Year are done and dusted and you’re back to your normal routine. There are no more parties to look forward to, loved ones visiting, or gifts to receive and what’s more, you’ve got to wait another year for it to come around again. It’s no wonder you feel down. This sadness or ‘glass half empty feeling’ might be due to the end of the holiday season, but it could also be that the environment is affecting your mood. At this time of year, days are longer and lack of sunshine can lead some people to feel depressed. This phenomenon is called Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), because people who suffer from it only experience symptoms at a particular time of year. It affects people in different ways - from difficulty waking in the morning, to oversleeping and over-eating, especially carbohydrates, which leads to weight gain. Other symptoms include a lack of energy, difficulty concentrating on or completing tasks, and withdrawal from loved ones and social activities - all of...