First Psychology blog

Owing to the demanding nature of modern life, families often face numerous pressures that can take a toll on the mental wellbeing of family members. Balancing work, parenting, finances and other commitments can sometimes create an environment of stress and tension. But by promoting open communication, spending quality time together, sharing responsibilities, setting realistic expectations and focusing on self-care, we can provide a supportive environment within our family where we can thrive. With the right strategies in place, we can begin to relieve family pressures. Open communication One of the most effective ways of alleviating family pressures is by establishing and encouraging open communication at home. Sharing thoughts, concerns and emotions can create a supportive environment where our family members are more likely to empathise and provide assistance when needed. According to a study conducted by the American Psychological Association , families that engage in frequent and q...

When used constructively, the words that we choose to speak can have a positive impact on both yourself and others. Similarly, negative or offensive language can be detrimental to our mental wellbeing. Ultimately, the language we use can determine how we feel about ourselves.  While the use of negative words can reduce our self-esteem or make us feel angry and sad, positive words can increase our self-confidence and make us feel happy. Words provide an extremely powerful tool that can shape our beliefs and influence our behaviour so it’s important that we choose them wisely not only to improve our own mental health but also those around us. Referenced by the Business Relationship Management Institute, the book called Words Can Change your Brain , written by neuroscientist Dr Andrew Newberg and communications expert Mark Robert Waldman, states that “a single word has the power to influence the expression of genes that regulate physical and emotional stress”. Positive things we can...

Communication isn’t always vocal, we communicate a lot about ourselves and our feelings through our body language, actions and behaviours. Do you say that you want to spend time with your partner, but sit staring at your laptop when you’re together? Do you suggest meeting a friend but always turn up late? There may be an underlying message in these behaviours. Perhaps you feel tired and don’t really want to interact with your partner or perhaps you feel ambivalent about meeting your friend and struggle to motivate yourself to get ready and out of the door on time. On the other hand, you may simply be struggling to cope and feel overloaded. It’s important to consider all non-verbal cues when reading a situation. These include not only actions, but also facial expressions and body language. What is your face and body saying about you? Did you know that research has found that we even judge the intelligence of others by their facial expressions? If you want to find out more about non-verb...

Whether it’s with your partner, a family member, or friend, arguments are never a pleasant experience and can cause a great deal of negative emotions such as sadness, anger and stress, to both parties involved. From time to time, there will be occasions when we get caught up in disagreements and sometimes hurtful things get said in the heat of the moment. So, one or both of you maybe lost your temper and walked away without resolving the argument. At some point in our lives, we’re all going to be faced with arguments and it’s only natural for this to happen. But it’s how we deal with the aftermath that's really significant and can determine our future relationship with the person. Calm down! Immediately following an argument, our emotions are likely to be running high and our heads are filled with what they said and what we said. Before we can even begin to build bridges, we need time to cool down and let our emotions settle. The best way we can do this is by spending some time a...

Much as we don’t like to think about it, stress can affect all of us – young and old. In today’s modern society, the pressures that we place on our children can cause them to feel overwhelmed and stressed, even though they may not know the words to accurately label their emotions. A little bit of stress is natural and can actually act as a driver to boost performance and help us build resilience. However, in young people stress can be a scary emotion to work through and the way they learn to deal with the stresses they face can affect the way they think, act and feel long into adulthood. In younger children, learning to form relationships with others and becoming less reliant on our parents can cause anxiety; for school-aged children the constant hamster wheel of school work and extra-curricular activities leaves little time for relaxation, which can be tiring and stressful. Alongside these pressures, we as parents are often under a fair amount of stress ourselves which, like i...

After a cosy, family-oriented festive season, January can sometimes fall a little flat. Often the pressure of holding it all together over the holidays can impact on our personal relationships in the New Year – add to that the miserable weather and it’s easy to see why we need to spend more time nurturing our relationships with those we hold dear. For us, January is about two things relationship-wise: taking the time to build trust with your partner and understanding the impact that the weather can have on your mood. When there’s trust in a relationship you know that whatever bickers and squabbles the winter months bring, it won’t impact on your relationship in the longer term. You can build trust in a number of ways: Building boundaries Having clear boundaries together is a crucial part of building trust. Boundaries can be about all kinds of things, including how much time you need to yourself. If you find the need to spend more time alone during the winter, be open with your pa...

Today is 'self-injury awareness day' which aims to bring attention to the issue of self-harm. Tackling the issue today could be the first step in stopping someone, or yourself, self-harming for good. Self-harming is when somebody deliberately hurts themselves (through cutting, bruising, burning or other methods) in order to help deal with any emotional pain they might be experiencing. We often associate it with teenage girls, but it occurs in men and women of all ages and the UK has the one of the highest self-harm rates in Europe. For many, it is a way to release emotions when they are feeling numb and can be an immense relief, but the behaviour can quickly become addictive and in the long term causes a great deal of psychological trauma. Many people wrongly believe those who self-harm are trying to get attention, but in fact most people desperately try to hide their behaviour. However there are crucial signs to look out for if you suspect a loved one may be self-harming, alth...

Valentine’s Day is fast approaching and it may seem as if we are surrounded by inflatable hearts and smug couples. The 14th of February is a day to celebrate love with our partner. However, for many couples it can shine an all too harsh (albeit red hued) light on a broken relationship. The biggest problems couples face can be the result of poor communication and so in order to have a great Valentine’s day and improve your relationship follow these simple tips. Discuss issues before they turn into problems. Many issues are not discussed until they suddenly become overwhelming and may be unresolvable. It is therefore very important to calmly discuss problems when they first arise in order to stop them spiralling out of control.  Share your views. We are sociable beings and enjoy talking about our feelings, hopes and aspirations but if our partner is unwilling to listen or share their own thoughts it can become frustrating. Set aside time to talk and agree not to be critical of one ...

Contrary to the woes of premarital cohabitation in our previous blog, evidence has recently come to light which suggests it is the individual's attitude toward the decision to live together that determines whether the relationship will succeed or fail. Couples who demonstrate commitment to each other before shacking up, by getting engaged for example, fair just as well as those who marry without living together first. Indeed, women may even reduce the risk of divorce if they make a conscious decision to live with their partner before marriage, though are twice as likely to part company if they serially cohabit. With this in mind, the decision to live together should not be taken lightly. Here is some advice on what to consider before doing so. Speak now or forever hold your peace - discuss issues, such as chores or who's welcome in your home when you're not around, before you move in. This will save problems later down the line. If you're worried bringing issues up will...

Following on from our previous blog, here are some more strategies on how to handle difficult co-workers. As everyone is different, there is obviously not one single, sure fire way to deal with awkward workmates but there are some things you can do, or rather avoid doing that can make the situation better. Avoid: sarcasm defensiveness. using 'you' - instead use 'I' and 'we' statements, as 'you' implies they are the problem not that the problem is shared. e.g. 'I don't understand' rather than 'You're not making sense'. expressing emotion as this makes it difficult for the other person to keep up their high level of emotion. This can be done by keeping your voice soft and your tone even. engaging. If the conflict continues and is not being resolved, then politely disengage from the situation by, for example, saying 'I think it would be better to discuss this when emotions aren't so high', then walk away.  If none ...

Your boss may be incompetent, but hellish co-workers can bring turmoil to your working life, as well as your emotional and physical well-being. Every organisation has one, if not many, and they come in different guises; the bully, the know-it-all and the suck up, to name a few. But don't worry, help is at hand with some useful advice on how to cope with these nightmare colleagues, and reduce stress at work in the process. Predict and prepare Work colleagues may be annoying but they tend to be pretty predictable as well. For instance, the work gossip will always gossip and the complainer will always complain. Although it is difficult to predict what people will do in every situation, we can anticipate the theme of this drama or conflict and prepare a response. Without this preparation, we are likely to react with anger or annoyance which will only make the situation worse. Role playing with someone you trust, and trying out a few responses can help you find the most effective wa...

With the recent, alarming statistics from the USA that women earn 84.6% and 78.3% of their male counterparts, in accordance with the number of hours they work (41-44 hours and over 60 hours respectively), it seems that women are still getting a raw deal in the workplace. However, men are getting a hard time in another way it seems. According to a new study, conducted by the Pennsylvania State University, male bosses who make mistakes are judged more harshly than women leaders who make the same errors. We all make mistakes but it seems the consequences of these errors can damage the perceptions of leaders who make them, for some more than others. Indeed, male bosses who make errors were deemed less competent and less effective as leaders and, as a result, employees were less likely to trust their decisions and were less willing to work for them. The findings, published in Springer's Journal of Business and Psychology online, went further to evaluate the effects of gender when the ...

The ability to communicate clearly is something we often take for granted. However, one in six people in the UK experience some form of hearing loss, which means we may be excluding people and making their lives more difficult without realising it. Deaf Awareness Week from 7-13 May aims to raise awareness and understanding of different types of deafness by highlighting the different methods of communication used by deaf and hard of hearing people. Communicating with someone who is deaf doesn't have to be hard, it just takes time and patience to make sure it is undertaken in the individuals’ preferred method and that above all, it is effective. Hearing aids can help but they don’t restore hearing perfectly and so the wearer may rely on lipreading. People born profoundly deaf often use sign language as their means of communication and often can’t lipread or understand written English - sign language is structured in a completely different way to English. Tips to help improve communic...