First Psychology blog

At some point in our lives we all deal with rejection. Even if we’re smart, beautiful or funny, rejection hits us hard, especially when it comes from those closest to us. Despite the hurt we may feel immediately, rejection doesn’t need to stop us in our tracks. Whether you feel rejected from your partner, a job or a friend you can use the pain as an opportunity to grow stronger by following this advice. Think about the positives. The most important thing to do is not measure your worth against the opinions of others. Instead think about your achievements and all the people that do care about you rather than focussing on the negatives.  Think of reasons behind the rejection. Understanding that it wasn’t personal can be a big help in moving on.  Look to the future. Despite what fairy tales led us to believe growing up, it takes time to find 'the one'. If someone you thought you had a future with has rejected you then they were probably not your perfect partner! Try to view t...

Once the excitement of a new promotion has settled, the prospect of asserting authority over your previous peers can be daunting. Almost everyone interested in moving to positions of greater responsibility will face this problem at some point in their lives and the chances are very few will do it with ease. Whether your new employees continue to treat you like their friend or just ignore your requests, the peer-to-boss transition can be a tough one. However, there are ways to negotiate through this bumpy period and emerge both as a stronger leader and a stronger team. Firstly, do not let co-workers reactions ruin your happiness over your promotion. You worked hard and were chosen for a reason. If you believe in your abilities, others will too.  Be confident, acting like a leader will make it easier for others to accept your new role.  Connect with your team; express your commitment to their success and that of the company. If they believe you are still on their side they wi...

Today we look at the third relaxation technique, body scan, which can be used to combat stress. Body scan is similar to progressive muscle relaxation, covered in our previous blog, but involves focusing on muscle groups rather than tensing and relaxing them. Technique 3 - body scan Lie down on your back with your legs straight out and your arms by your sides. Focus on your breathing and breathe deeply for two minutes or until you feel ready to start. Focus on your toes on your right foot. Tune in to the sensations you feel there and imagine your breathe flowing from the sole of your foot.  After a few minutes, move your focus to your right ankle and repeat process. Then move to your right calf, knee, thigh and hip and repeat for the left side of your body. From there, move up to your torso, through your lower back and abdomen, the upper back and chest, and your shoulders. Pay close attention to any parts that are uncomfortable. Move your focus to your fingers on your righ...

Today is National Stress Awareness Day and this year's focus is on beating work-related stress, something that according to figures from the charity MIND affects half a million people in the UK to a level that is making them ill. So what causes work-related stress? At work we may find ourselves working side by side with people we wouldn't choose to spend time with. Add to that the fact that people often have different working styles, for example, one person may work very intensely for five hours then appear to be 'slacking' for the rest of the day while their colleague may keep their head down all day and work at a consistent, less intense pace. Conflicts can arise with one person perceiving another not to be pulling their weight while the other person may wonder how they can possibly be expected to do more. As a result people may feel under pressure to drive themselves harder, particularly if there is a potential threat of redundancy. Other people's expectations an...

Positive psychology is a growing field of study and as such, there is a wealth of research revealing ways to live longer, healthier and happier lives. Here are some interesting findings on happiness. Happiness has its roots in our genes – although 50% of our happiness is created by external factors such as relationships, health and work, research conducted at the University of Edinburgh and Queensland Institute has found happiness is partly determined by our personality. They also found that personality and happiness are, by and large, hereditary. People with certain types of personality are happier – using a framework called the Five-Factor Model to rate participants' personalities, the research above also discovered people who are sociable, conscientious and do not excessively worry tend to be happier. There are six variables that predict happiness – various research has revealed positive self-esteem, perceived sense of control, extroversion, optimism, positive relations...

With the recent, alarming statistics from the USA that women earn 84.6% and 78.3% of their male counterparts, in accordance with the number of hours they work (41-44 hours and over 60 hours respectively), it seems that women are still getting a raw deal in the workplace. However, men are getting a hard time in another way it seems. According to a new study, conducted by the Pennsylvania State University, male bosses who make mistakes are judged more harshly than women leaders who make the same errors. We all make mistakes but it seems the consequences of these errors can damage the perceptions of leaders who make them, for some more than others. Indeed, male bosses who make errors were deemed less competent and less effective as leaders and, as a result, employees were less likely to trust their decisions and were less willing to work for them. The findings, published in Springer's Journal of Business and Psychology online, went further to evaluate the effects of gender when the ...

With many of us feeling the pinch, it can be easy to confuse being better off financially with greater well-being. However, an innovative measure known as the Happy Planet Index (HPI) questions this idea by examining how each country converts the planet’s natural resources into longevity and happiness for its citizens. Surprisingly, the country with the highest level of well-being amongst its citizens and the highest HPI, is Costa Rica. Costa Rica is by no means the richest country in monetary terms but uses only a quarter of the resources most countries use, and was ranked the 6th happiest nation on Earth by a recent Gallup poll (2010). In contrast, the USA, which uses triple the resources of the average person and whose citizens’ well-being has remained the same over the last 50 years in spite of this, has a HPI of 114 only one place above Nigeria. So why is this? Perhaps it’s because countries like America measure success in terms of money and material possessions which are not ...

One of the biggest stresses of modern day life is work and identifying what causes your stress puts you in a better position to manage it more effectively. Here are four common causes of stress in the workplace: Job ambiguity – poorly defined jobs with no procedures in place and ambiguous goals can lead to stress as it leaves us unsure of what we’re supposed to do and why we’re doing it. Favouritism and inequality – unfair treatment at work can be a major source of stress. Often promotion, raises and other perks, which should be given to recognise and reward good performance, are based on favouritism and seniority. This is demotivating and leaves us wondering why we bother. Politics and power – some organisations are inherently stressful because in order to get ahead they expect us to play the game and many of us just don’t want to. These organisations are often run by political game players who overlook hard working employees for power hungry individuals, and exist because ...

On 1 January many of us pledge, with enthusiasm and determination, that we are going to quit smoking or lose weight, yet by February most of us have discarded these goals altogether. Four out of ten people make New Year’s resolutions but with such a low success rate, why do we continue to make them every year? Perhaps it’s because the new year marks a new beginning. In our minds, it initiates a change, offers us a fresh start and the possibility to wipe the slate clean. We think back over the past year and consider what we could have done better and this feeds our desire to change. You might think New Year is like any other day of the year, but this fixed date in the calendar allows us to prepare, and make plans for change. Another reason for resolutions might simply be tradition. It is understood that Julius Caesar started the tradition to honour the Roman mythical God Janus, who had two faces – one to look back into the past and one to look to the new year. The Babylonians howe...

In honour of anti-bullying week this week from 14-18 November, we are focusing on a potentially common problem in every organisation - workplace bullying. Indeed, surveys by the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development suggest between 3 and 14 million employees in the UK are subjected to bullying. Bullying can occur face-to-face or remotely via email and other media and may take the form of abuse, physical or verbal violence, humiliation or simply trying to undermine someone’s confidence. Employers have a ‘duty of care’ to their employees which includes dealing with bullying at work. It can be difficult if you are being bullied, but here are a few steps you could take to help improve the situation. Talk to your line manager as they have a responsibility to resolve the issue. If the bully is your manager, then speak to your union/workplace representative or someone in Human Resources as they can accompany you to meetings with your manager. Alternatively, you could contac...

Today is National Stress Awareness Day - a day aimed at raising awareness of stress and the impact it can have on our lives. As an independent provider of counselling, psychology and coaching services we see many many people who are suffering the ill effects of stress in their lives. So what can we do about it? We are running a FREE 'Stress Factor' event in Glasgow this autumn to help you manage stress and we will be giving away a free 'stress guide' to all attendees too. For more details see  http://www.glasgowpsychology.co.uk/stress_factor.htm

Did you know the average person spends 100,000 hours of their life at work and the job or career that suits you will depend very much on who you are and your strengths and weaknesses? That's a lot of hours and some very good reasons to think about which job or career is right for you. Whether you are already in a career and wish to improve your job satisfaction or are unemployed and looking for work, our qualified coach, Lindsey Burns can help with her new 'coaching for career management package'. Lindsey is offering the package of five specially tailored coaching sessions for career management at our Glasgow and Edinburgh centres. It is priced at a very reasonable £299, which is a saving on the cost of five separate coaching sessions with Lindsey. Special offer Book and pay for the 'coaching for careers management package' before the end of October you will only have to pay £250, giving you an additional saving of £49 on the full package price. Quote BLO...