How to Raise Confident Kids

While many of us look back on our childhood and remember the good times with happy memories, growing up isn’t always easy for everyone. Learning about how to fit in with social expectations while being comfortable in your own skin can be pretty tricky for a child. Even more so when they hit teenage years and their hormones start to kick in.

Nowadays, with the added pressures of social media defining what you 'should' look like or how you 'should' behave, kids have even more to deal with.

Why is confidence important for our mental health?

Low confidence and self-esteem are not mental health conditions as such, however, the way we feel about ourselves can have a huge impact on our emotional and mental wellbeing. These negative feelings can cause a child to believe that they’re not worthy of love or aren’t 'good enough' when comparing themselves to others. This can affect how they live their lives as they get older. Researchers from the University of Washington found that: "as young as 5 years of age self-esteem is established strongly enough to be measured."

Having confidence from a young age can benefit a child in many ways, from giving them a more positive outlook on life and taking risks to performing well at school and forming strong relationships. Ultimately, self-esteem and confidence can be an important factor in how successful a child is and how strong they become emotionally and mentally.

Ways to empower your children

As a parent or carer, it’s our responsibility to teach our children to be confident in themselves so that they become happy, positive adults who strive for success.

1. Love them unconditionally

It goes without saying that you should show your child love, but by loving them unconditionally when they make mistakes is just as important. Whether or not they achieve good grades at school or they come last in the egg and spoon race, they should know that you still love them regardless.

2. Give them freedom

Obviously when a child’s really young, this doesn’t mean letting them loose on the streets, rather giving them freedom of expression and to be themselves. When we continually say “no” to a child or punish them for not conforming to social norms, it knocks their confidence, and they begin to lose their sense of identity and self-esteem. Encourage them to dress how they want to and to express their own opinions, as long as it is done respectfully.

3. Unleash the apron strings

One of the best ways for children to learn is by making their own mistakes. Although it’s important to minimise environmental dangers, it’s equally as important to let them figure things out for themselves. Trial and error usually present the best lessons in life.

4. Praise effort

While it’s good to celebrate children’s achievements, this can often lead to the belief that unless they’re successful, they’re not worthy of praise. This can cause low self-confidence and deter them from trying again. When we praise children for the effort that they put into something rather than just the outcome, this will encourage them to try again or even harder in the future.

Further information

For more about raising confident children, download our free booklet 'Flourishing children - help your child to thrive' here >