First Psychology blog

Relationships inevitably have their ups and downs. If your relationship felt the strain over the festive period and things are still a little frosty, here are some tips that could help put your relationship back on track. Relationships take work – successful relationships don’t just happen on their own and require both parties to take a risk and share their thoughts, ideas and feelings. You cannot change your partner – if you are hoping in time your partner's behaviour will change then think again. All you can do is inform your partner of your needs.  Arguments hide your own fear or pain – when you get upset it might not be for the reason you think. You should work out what's going before you go laying the blame at your partner's door.  Men and women are different – by acknowledging these differences and revelling in them you can live together in a more fun and harmonious fashion.  Honour your partner every day – respect and cherish your partner to show your co...

January is usually a cold month, and it seems it is a chilly time for marriages too. It is reportedly the most popular time of year to file for divorce - so much so that in legal circles it has been nicknamed 'divorce month'. According to statistics published by eDivorcePapers.com, January does indeed have the most legal breakups. Some people even go as far as to specify ‘divorce day’ claiming the first Monday after children go back to school -  or the start of the first full working week - is the most popular. However although January is when people take the plunge, it seems people start gathering information much earlier. Meyer, who founded DivorcedWomenOnline.com, reports an increase in the number of page views of the website on Boxing Day. But why is January such a popular month to instigate divorce? At the end of each year it is common to look back and reflect on the year gone by. By doing so, people who are not happy in their relationship may assess their situatio...

Burns Night could be described as the second national day in Scotland particularly as it is more widely celebrated than the official day itself, St Andrew’s day. In honour of this occasion, we are going to consider national pride and the effect it has on our well-being. Indeed, it has been shown that feeling good about our country also makes us feel good about our own lives. However, a political scientist at American University and a sociologist from Catholic University in Belgium have gone further to consider different types of pride. They define two types of national pride. ‘Ethnic’ nationalism which describes ancestry and the boundaries of society in terms of race or religion and ‘civic’ nationalism which only requires respect for a country’s laws and institutions. The latter, therefore, is more inclusive incorporating immigrants as well as minorities. The researchers analysed responses from 40,677 individuals in 31 different countries, assessing subjective well-being and nati...

We know that this time of of year can be depressing - low levels of light, cold weather, less money than usual after Christmas... Instead of focusing on this low mood however, an alternative approach taken from positive psychology is to focus on gratitude. This concept has long been embraced by religions and philosophies who view gratitude as a manifestation of virtue, and an important part of health and well-being. More recently psychology has realised the potential of gratitude. Indeed, Michael McCullough a psychology professor at the University of Miami believes when you stop and count your blessings, you hijack your emotional system. In other words, you direct your attention to good things. Practising gratitude on a regular basis can change the way our brain neurons fire into more positive automatic patterns. These positive emotions can ease distress and broaden our thinking. Gratitude can help us feel connected and remind us that we are part of something bigger. Here are s...

You may now be into your third week of abstaining from cigarettes and doing really well. However, for those of you who are struggling to stick to that New Year’s resolution to give up, there is some encouraging news. According to researchers at the University of Wisconsin School of Medicine and Public Health, successful quitters are more satisfied with their lives and feel healthier - both one year and three years afterwards - than those who continue to smoke. There is a wealth of information on how giving up smoking can save lives and improve health, but not so much on how quitting can affect your quality of life. Indeed, smokers often believe stopping smoking will reduce their quality of life in terms of disrupting their routine, effecting relationships, interfering with their ability to cope and losing the pleasure they derive from smoking itself. In this study, 1,504 smokers taking part in a smoking cessation trial were assessed on their overall quality of life which included m...

Christmas and New Year are done and dusted and you’re back to your normal routine. There are no more parties to look forward to, loved ones visiting, or gifts to receive and what’s more, you’ve got to wait another year for it to come around again. It’s no wonder you feel down. This sadness or ‘glass half empty feeling’ might be due to the end of the holiday season, but it could also be that the environment is affecting your mood. At this time of year, days are longer and lack of sunshine can lead some people to feel depressed. This phenomenon is called Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), because people who suffer from it only experience symptoms at a particular time of year. It affects people in different ways - from difficulty waking in the morning, to oversleeping and over-eating, especially carbohydrates, which leads to weight gain. Other symptoms include a lack of energy, difficulty concentrating on or completing tasks, and withdrawal from loved ones and social activities - all of...

Following on from our last blog on how to stick your New Year’s resolutions, here are five more tips on how to achieve your goals. 6. Change is a process  Many of our bad habits have developed over months and years, so understandably it might take just as long to change them. Although it might take a while to achieve your goals, the important thing is, not how long it takes, but, that your behaviour changes in the long run. 7. Don't be put off  If you revert back to an old habit, don’t view this as a setback, but rather a learning opportunity. There are always going to be challenges along the way, but it is how you deal with these that matters. You might want to keep a resolution journal to write down important information such as when the relapse occurred and what might have triggered it. By understanding these challenges, you will be better able to cope with them in the future. 8. Get support from loved ones  Explain your resolution to loved ones or even join a gr...

The new year is a great time to focus on what we would like to change in our lives to better ourselves physically, intellectually, socially, emotionally and psychologically. However, as we have already mentioned in our last blog post, sometimes it is difficult to stick to these resolutions. Here are some tips on how to increase your chances of achieving your goals. 1. Be specific and realistic  In setting your goals be as specific as you can. Instead of saying you want to lose weight, state how much weight you want to lose and be realistic about what you can achieve. For example, ten pounds not five stone. By being concrete about your goal, you can plan exactly what you need to do to achieve it over the coming year. 2. One resolution only  You might have a whole list of things you would like to change, but if you focus on all of them at once you run the risk of spreading yourself too thin. Instead, just pick one goal and focus your energy on that. 3. Don't leave it until...

On 1 January many of us pledge, with enthusiasm and determination, that we are going to quit smoking or lose weight, yet by February most of us have discarded these goals altogether. Four out of ten people make New Year’s resolutions but with such a low success rate, why do we continue to make them every year? Perhaps it’s because the new year marks a new beginning. In our minds, it initiates a change, offers us a fresh start and the possibility to wipe the slate clean. We think back over the past year and consider what we could have done better and this feeds our desire to change. You might think New Year is like any other day of the year, but this fixed date in the calendar allows us to prepare, and make plans for change. Another reason for resolutions might simply be tradition. It is understood that Julius Caesar started the tradition to honour the Roman mythical God Janus, who had two faces – one to look back into the past and one to look to the new year. The Babylonians howe...