Navigating Tough Conversations

Tough conversations are part of daily life. They may include conflict with loved ones to debates with colleagues. While these conversations may be challenging, they offer an opportunity for growth and deeper understanding. However, navigating tough conversations can be emotionally draining and can negatively impact our mental wellbeing. The good news is that there are a number of strategies you can use to help approach difficult conversations with empathy and openness while remaining kind to yourself. 

Use empathy as a foundation

Empathy is crucial when engaging in tough conversations. It allows us to understand and relate to the emotions and perspectives of others. Before entering into any difficult discussion, it’s essential to think about how things may be from the other person's perspective. This helps us gain insight into their thoughts and feelings, allowing for a more constructive and compassionate conversation.

A study released by Ohio State University says: “Focusing on blame is ineffective because it inhibits our ability to learn what really caused the problem and to do anything of significance to correct it. Blame is about making judgments while effective conflict management is about learning from mistakes, understanding different perceptions of the same reality, and adjusting one’s behavior for better results in the future.”

Use active listening skills and validate emotions

Active listening allows us to give our full attention to the person we’re speaking with and by doing this we can understand their point of view better and validate their emotions. Validation doesn't mean we have to agree with their perspective, it simply acknowledges their feelings, creating a safe space for open and honest dialogue. Really listening and validating the other person's emotions gives a sense of respect and understanding, which supports both parties' feelings and mental wellbeing.

Stay calm and non-defensive

Difficult conversations can evoke strong emotions, often leading to defensiveness and reactive behaviours. To nurture positive wellbeing, we need to remain calm and composed. Taking deep breaths, grounding ourselves in the present moment and reminding ourselves that we have control over our reactions can help us respond in a less defensive way. It's important to avoid making personal attacks and instead focus on the issue at hand. This creates a more conducive environment for productive dialogue.

Be assertive and set boundaries

Being assertive involves expressing our thoughts and feelings respectfully, without undermining the other person's perspective. Assertiveness also includes setting boundaries and communicating them clearly. This is important because it helps protect ourselves from unnecessary stress and create a space where constructive conversation can take place.

Find common ground and seek understanding

Seeking common ground is vital to finding resolution and maintain mental wellbeing. Instead of focusing on differences, actively look for areas of agreement. This helps create a sense of unity and allows both parties to work towards a solution. Ask open-ended questions to really understand the other person's view. This can also help create empathy and open the conversation to new perspectives.

Take breaks and practise self-care

Difficult conversations can be emotionally draining and overwhelming and it's therefore important to recognise when we need to take breaks. Making some space allows us to process emotions and prevent burnout. Do something you enjoy during these breaks. Reading, exercise, or spending time with loved ones can be good ways to restore mental wellbeing. 

Reflect on and learn from tough conversations

Take some time after difficult conversations to allow yourself to process what was said. This can help you gain an insight into our own emotions, reactions and areas for growth. It also helps us learn from difficult experiences and improve communication skills for future conversations. Embracing personal growth helps us enhance our mental wellbeing and develop more effective strategies for navigating tough conversations.


Although navigating tough conversations can be emotionally taxing, approaching these conversations with empathy, active listening and non-defensive responses, can foster understanding, bridge gaps and promote mental wellness.